A New Low

Throughout my 27+ years I’ve made many compromises, as I’m sure you have too. When I was wee toddler, I was waned off the diaper in exchange for the feeling of independence that comes with wiping one’s own ass (in retrospect, this may have been a mistake). At the onset of puberty, I was relinquished of innocence in exchange for erections and years of sexual frustration. At 14, I got my first job and surrendered both my childhood and free time for money. Yup, compromise can be a bitch.

But despite all of the tradeoffs we’re forced to make throughout life, there are several decisions I set in stone a long time ago. And astonishingly enough, I’ve stuck to ‘em.

For example:

Despite growing up with a family that finds merit in the lyrics of Toby Keith, I’ve never voted Republican. In spite of everyone talking about it and it being shown on “America’s most watched network,” I’ve never seen a single episode of Survivor. And even though I’ve been listening to music my whole life, I’ve never owned a Pearl Jam record.

And I’ve never, I repeat never, dressed up a dog.

….Wait.

Shit.

The cutest and gayest thing ever.

The cutest and gayest thing ever.

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One Response to “A New Low”

  1. It Girl Says:

    Yesssssssssss!

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